WEGO health Writing day #30- I slacked big time. A day late....

Yesterday's prompt--- Today, write a recap of your experience. What was your favorite prompt? Least favorite? What have you learned? Or describe your HAWMC experience in one word!

I tried. I really did. Between starting back to work, school homework, kids etc... I can't believe I managed to do 14 out of 30. I think that's a pretty good average.
Some days I knew what I wanted to write but didn't have the time, or the energy to get it done. Some days I just plain forgot I had it going on.
I like Day 7, 9 and 19.
Here are the links to them.....

http://gutsylisa.blogspot.com/2013/04/day-7-wego-writers-challenge.html?zx=aa8d516472424431

http://gutsylisa.blogspot.com/2013/04/wego-health-writers-challenge-day-9.html

http://gutsylisa.blogspot.com/2013/04/wego-day-19-vintage-lisa-throwback-pic.html

I've been really realizing the last few weeks how much impact my daily symptoms have on my life. I've been struggling with spasms STILL. The Flexeril and Valium barely keep them limited enough so I can function but I have had some days recently that a double dose didn't help. I went back to work and from day #1 my body is retaliating. Pain. Spasms. I can smile and fake it through most of my pain and discomfort now. I've had lots of practice.
Today I feel worn out. Just completely run down. It's a flashback feeling I don't like at all. I could just lay in bed all day. I'm working 5-10pm today so something has to give or it'll be a long rough night.
The frustration of feeling like I'm at the mercy of my stupid body that won't get it's act together is indescribable. I HATE it. The broken sleep is killing me. Being awake from 3-430 in the morning KILLS me. It's nightly. I'm tired(ha!) of it. My brain wants to wake up and go for a run. My body wants to stay in the fetal position in PJs all day long. I'm upset. I'm pissed. I'm annoyed. I'm fed up. I went for an MRI yesterday to see if there is anything the inconclusive $700 CT scan missed. For $700 it should have come to clean my bathrooms too. So now we wait. I should have results by tomorrow. I'm losing blood. Daily. It's not much but ANY puts me in panic mode. I definitely haven't hit anemic mode or anything because I know that feeling all too well. I can function like it ain't no thang at a 7 hemoglobin when normal is around 14. Sick girl. Ugh.
Also the self esteem is at an all time rock bottom low lately. I hate what I see. Oddly, my scars are the last thing I'm dissatisfied with!! it's everything else. I'm just weak. And look like shit. I'm tired. I'm out of shape. I feel like I've aged 10 years in the last 4. Chronic pain and illness will do that I suppose.
Anyway, enough of my sobbing.
Have a good day everyone. My semester is winding down. Having a mental battle about what to do about school. On the fence about continuing. I need a nap. Or a drink. Whatever.

Yesterday's prompt--- Today, write a recap of your experience. What was your favorite prompt? Least favorite? What have you learned? Or describe your HAWMC experience in one word!

I tried. I really did. Between starting back to work, school homework, kids etc... I can't believe I managed to do 14 out of 30. I think that's a pretty good average.
Some days I knew what I wanted to write but didn't have the time, or the energy to get it done. Some days I just plain forgot I had it going on.
I like Day 7, 9 and 19.
Here are the links to them.....

http://gutsylisa.blogspot.com/2013/04/day-7-wego-writers-challenge.html?zx=aa8d516472424431

http://gutsylisa.blogspot.com/2013/04/wego-health-writers-challenge-day-9.html

http://gutsylisa.blogspot.com/2013/04/wego-day-19-vintage-lisa-throwback-pic.html

I've been really realizing the last few weeks how much impact my daily symptoms have on my life. I've been struggling with spasms STILL. The Flexeril and Valium barely keep them limited enough so I can function but I have had some days recently that a double dose didn't help. I went back to work and from day #1 my body is retaliating. Pain. Spasms. I can smile and fake it through most of my pain and discomfort now. I've had lots of practice.
Today I feel worn out. Just completely run down. It's a flashback feeling I don't like at all. I could just lay in bed all day. I'm working 5-10pm today so something has to give or it'll be a long rough night.
The frustration of feeling like I'm at the mercy of my stupid body that won't get it's act together is indescribable. I HATE it. The broken sleep is killing me. Being awake from 3-430 in the morning KILLS me. It's nightly. I'm tired(ha!) of it. My brain wants to wake up and go for a run. My body wants to stay in the fetal position in PJs all day long. I'm upset. I'm pissed. I'm annoyed. I'm fed up. I went for an MRI yesterday to see if there is anything the inconclusive $700 CT scan missed. For $700 it should have come to clean my bathrooms too. So now we wait. I should have results by tomorrow. I'm losing blood. Daily. It's not much but ANY puts me in panic mode. I definitely haven't hit anemic mode or anything because I know that feeling all too well. I can function like it ain't no thang at a 7 hemoglobin when normal is around 14. Sick girl. Ugh.
Also the self esteem is at an all time rock bottom low lately. I hate what I see. Oddly, my scars are the last thing I'm dissatisfied with!! it's everything else. I'm just weak. And look like shit. I'm tired. I'm out of shape. I feel like I've aged 10 years in the last 4. Chronic pain and illness will do that I suppose.
Anyway, enough of my sobbing.
Have a good day everyone. My semester is winding down. Having a mental battle about what to do about school. On the fence about continuing. I need a nap. Or a drink. Whatever.